Mind the Gap

“You said you liked me. Was that… was it all a lie?”

“How could an Alpha ever like a Beta?” Alex shot back, the words tasting like ash.

Caught between a mother who had abandoned him and a father who forced him into the rigid mold of an Alpha, Alex had grown up unable to lean on anyone. Nathan had been the sole exception—the only person who had ever offered him true comfort, regardless of their secondary dynamics. Yet, to protect Nathan from a certain incident, Alex had driven him away with cruel, unforgiving words.

For nine years, Alex lived in a purgatory of yearning and atonement. Then, one day, fate intervened—he was assigned to a case, and the sole witness was none other than the man he had left behind.

“Mr. Nathan, if it’s alright—no, if it wouldn’t be an imposition—I have something to say…”

“If you’re thinking of apologizing, there’s no need,” Nathan replied, his tone sharp and immediate.

Desperate to make amends, Alex hovered around him, treading lightly as he sought any chance to apologize. Nathan, however, kept his guard raised, maintaining a cold, strictly professional distance that rebuffed every advance.

That impenetrable wall might have held, had Nathan not discovered Alex’s secret: a severe hormonal abnormality triggered by years of abusing suppressants.

“You just need to sleep with an Omega. Why look for anything else?” Nathan asked, his voice biting. “You like Omegas, don’t you?”

“I’m not seeing any Omegas right now,” Alex stammered, looking away. “And… I don’t think I can do it with a stranger.”

Alex tried his best to politely decline, attempting to mask how much he truly wanted this. Nathan had initially turned away with a frigid dismissal, telling him to suit himself, only to inevitably return with an unexpected offer to help.

“You can have sex with someone you don’t even like,” Nathan stated flatly. “Don’t read into it. It’s just sex.”

“You don’t have to force yourself to do something like that with someone as disgusting as me,” Alex whispered, his self-loathing bleeding through.

“You aren’t disgusting.” Nathan’s gaze was unwavering. “So think about it properly and give me an answer.”

Nathan clearly wanted no part in tangling their lives together again, yet he was reaching out with this confusing, rough tenderness. It was enough to make Alex want to break down and weep.

Am I truly beyond your forgiveness? The thought echoed in the hollows of his chest. You were the only joy I ever had.

Nathan, please, just once… just listen to why I did it.