Chapter 22

Leicester Square was, as always, a suffocating sea of people.

Pushing his way through the dense crowd, Alex patted down his hair. The abrasive noise and chaos inherent to such a massive tourist trap immediately spiked his anxiety. He had deliberately chosen this location because it was famously generic and straightforward, but arriving in the midst of the crush made him realize it might have been a catastrophic mistake.

Clenching and unclenching his freezing hands, he bounded up the stairs two at a time, ignoring the crumpled receipts, discarded banana peels, and greasy burger wrappers littering the concrete.

There he is.

Nathan had arrived first. The moment Alex cleared the top of the stairs, he locked onto that brilliant flash of golden-blonde hair. Because the Beta’s head was bowed slightly, the pale, flawless curve of his neck was beautifully exposed to the fading light. Alex sucked in a ragged breath. His hesitating sneakers finally made the decision to move, breaking into a jog toward the boy.

“Sorry, am I late?”

Stopping carefully a few feet away, Alex called out to him. Nathan, who had been staring blankly at his phone, lifted his head. The flawlessly stoic mask he always wore instantly softened, replaced by a faint, breathtaking smile.

“You’re here?”

This is weird.

“Let’s go.”

Nathan never usually smiles like this…

Straightening his posture smoothly, Nathan looked directly at Alex, his eyes crinkling into vivid crescents. Because it was an expression Alex was so rarely permitted to see, he was thrown into pure panic. He had absolutely no idea where to look. Even though the Beta’s lips were pressed into a relatively neutral line, staring directly into those playfully curved eyes made Alex feel like he was going to start acting like a stuttering idiot.

The terrifying reality was that Nathan looked so devastatingly beautiful when he smiled that Alex was barely managing to suppress the desperate urge to stare at him forever.

“Hey, Nathan,” Alex ventured cautiously.

Even though he was supposedly the one leading this practice date, he found himself helplessly trailing a half-step behind the Beta as he asked the question.

“Yeah?”

“Did something good happen today?”

Nathan glanced briefly over his shoulder. The teasing smile vanished, instantly replaced by his signature, unreadable stoicism.

“Isn’t this a date?” Nathan asked blankly.

“Uh… yeah?”

“That’s why I’m smiling.”

What the hell do I do? He absolutely couldn’t allow himself to fall for the delusion, but that single, casually delivered sentence sent searing heat rocketing straight to his earlobes. He felt like he was going to throw up from the intense vertigo. It felt exactly as if he had swallowed dozens of frantic butterflies that were now violently fluttering inside his stomach.

“Is it weird?” Nathan asked.

“No, it’s incredibly pretty,” Alex blurted out.

Hesitating slightly, Alex finally managed to close the gap, falling into step beside him. However, the smile had completely vanished from Nathan’s face. A crushing wave of regret slammed into him.

“I mean it, seriously,” Alex added desperately, terrified he had ruined the moment.

Nathan simply watched him in silence for a few agonizing seconds before smoothly correcting him.

“Don’t call me pretty.”

“Then what?”

“Tell me I’m handsome. I like that a lot better.”

He is so fucking cute. Desperately struggling to maintain a serious expression, Alex nodded frantically.

“Yeah, you’re incredibly handsome. Insanely handsome.”

The unreadable mask chilling Nathan’s face slowly began to thaw. A soft, genuine chuckle finally slipped past his lips.

“I mean it,” Alex insisted softly.

They fell into a comfortable rhythm as they walked. Even though they hadn’t actually done a single thing yet, Alex’s mood was already soaring into the stratosphere.

“Obviously I know you’re handsome. You’re the most handsome guy in the entire world.”

At the blatant, overflowing praise, Nathan let out a dry, incredulous scoff.

“Once you actually get taller than me, you won’t be able to tease me like this anymore,” Nathan shot back defensively.

Alex nodded along, fully willing to play along with the Beta’s stubborn delusion. A bright, genuine smile tugged at the corners of his mouth.

“I completely believe that, too.”

The streets were suffocating. The quiet, intimate cadence of their conversation was constantly swallowed by the roaring noise of the crowd, only to miraculously surface again over the narrow cobblestones. As they walked with a careful, deliberate distance between them, a massive, rowdy group of tourists suddenly surged past.

In an instant, Alex was violently shoved toward the glass storefronts, but Nathan’s hand shot out, grabbing Alex firmly by the waist.

His entire body froze. The ‘Thank you’ resting on his tongue instantly evaporated. They were terrifyingly, impossibly close.

“What are you actually going to do when I finally get taller than you?” Nathan murmured.

The hand that had briefly rested against his waist fell away. Utterly paralyzed, Alex stumbled backward several steps before barely managing to regain his bearings. Every single nerve ending in his body was screaming, hyper-fixated on the exact patch of skin on his lower back where Nathan had touched him. His breath shuddered out in ragged bursts.

Because the piercing green eyes staring directly at him felt so overwhelmingly intense, Alex couldn’t even manage to meet his gaze as he stammered out a reply.

“Then… I’ll grant you one wish.”

Even after the crowd had cleared, leaving plenty of empty space on the pavement, Nathan made no effort to re-establish the distance between them. Because his breathing refused to stabilize, Alex was forced to hold his breath entirely.

Releasing a low, thoughtful hum, Nathan slowly nodded.

“Alright, I’ll hold you to that.”

A heavy, charged silence settled over them. Nathan, graciously participating in this bizarre practice date, felt profoundly, dangerously different from his usual self. Alex couldn’t pinpoint the exact shift, but an accumulation of subtle differences was relentlessly pushing his anxiety into the red zone.

Is there anything Nathan actually can’t do?

Lost in that suffocating spiral, they finally entered the bustling streets of Chinatown. Taking in the chaotic rows of glittering casinos and crowded restaurants, Alex was suddenly plunged into pure panic.

What the hell do we do now?

Aside from the intoxicating bliss of simply having Nathan walking beside him, a terrifying wave of vertigo washed over him. He felt like he had spent the entire day agonizing over the plans so intensely that it was a genuine miracle he hadn’t died from the stress. Glancing at his watch, Alex noted the time: 5:00 PM. It was rapidly approaching dinner, so the most logical, failsafe option was to get food first.

Is dating genuinely supposed to be this stressful? How the hell do people manage to do this every single day?

The crushing pressure to execute a flawless date was literally suffocating him.

“Hey, Nathan,” Alex started carefully.

Just take it one step at a time. The first thing we need to do is pick a place to eat.

“Do you like bubble tea?”

However, the words that actually exploded out of his mouth completely betrayed his meticulously constructed plan. The catastrophic mistake occurred entirely because they had just happened to walk directly past a massive, brightly lit boba shop.

“I’ve never actually had it,” Nathan replied softly, graciously humoring the wildly abrupt question.

“Really? Not even when Tina and Jude were drinking it?”

“I’m not a huge fan of what’s inside,” Nathan admitted.

“The tapioca pearls?”

“They look exactly like frog eggs.”

Ah. He had never actually thought of them like that. While Alex wasn’t exactly an avid consumer, he drank it occasionally if the opportunity presented itself.

“Why? Do you want some?” Nathan asked, his footsteps grinding to an abrupt halt.

“Huh?”

“Let’s go.”

Nathan moved first.

The desperate suggestion to grab dinner completely evaporated from Alex’s mind as Nathan executed his next move.

Their hands brushed.

Forcing his rigid neck to move, Alex dropped his gaze downward. Long, elegant, pale fingers were gently wrapping around the back of his sun-darkened hand.

The searing heat didn’t hit him until several agonizing seconds later. Much like the dizzying shock of seeing people kiss for the very first time as a child, the simple, innocent friction of their hands overlapping sent the world spinning violently off its axis.

Staring blankly at their connected hands, Alex slowly, terrifyingly pulled his hand away. His ring finger twitched. The heat started at the base of his pale neck and rapidly crawled upward, painting his skin in a furious red. As the sun finally broke free from the clouds, drowning the busy street in a brilliant, fiery orange, the devastating truth of Alex’s bright red face was fully exposed to the light.

His eyes stung fiercely from the agonizing effort required to suppress the chaotic emotions violently threatening to overflow.

Nathan stood in complete silence. Those cold, piercing green eyes tracked the hand slipping away from his grasp before slowly turning back up to lock onto Alex’s face. The fleeting, precarious connection was entirely severed.

It was only then that Nathan finally parted his lips.

“Do you not like it?”

Bubble tea.

The belatedly added clarification was barely audible over the roaring noise in Alex’s ears. Even without looking in a mirror, Alex knew with horrifying certainty just how violently red his face had become.

Did he figure it out? The terrifying thought slammed into his mind.

“I like it, but…”

He stuttered pathetically, desperately averting his eyes. He fought an agonizing battle to suppress the overwhelming urge to throw his arm over his face and hide. He was terrified that if he met Nathan’s eyes for even one more second, the ugly, desperate truth would come spilling out of his mouth.

You can’t do that.

If you say it out loud, it’s permanently over.

However, his paralyzed body completely failed to supply a smoother, more convincing excuse. Desperately scraping together his scattered breath, Alex finally managed to speak.

“I just… I mean, I’ve never… actually held hands with anyone before, so…”

I’m sorry. I just panicked.

Looking up at Nathan with wide, terrified eyes that genuinely looked ready to burst into tears, Alex waited for the verdict. Nathan merely stared calmly at the Alpha’s completely shattered, panicked expression.

“You’ve never held hands?” Nathan asked softly.

Alex offered a stiff nod. Maybe when I was a little kid, but I definitely don’t remember it.

Hearing the confirmation, Nathan slowly reached out. Catching the twitching, retreating index finger of Alex’s left hand, the Beta held firm.

“Then I guess we should hold hands more often.”

His fingers slowly, deliberately slipped through Alex’s. Unlike the fleeting brush from before, Nathan gently, perfectly intertwined their fingers. As the surface area of their connected skin expanded, Alex squeezed his eyes completely shut. A feverish, shuddering breath slowly parted his lips.

“We’re going to be doing a lot more than this, anyway.”

Their hands were finally, fully locked together. This was the very first time Alex had ever truly held Nathan’s hand, and the Beta’s skin was surprisingly much colder than his own. The fingers he had always assumed would be small were actually relatively similar in size to his own.

Keeping his eyes squeezed shut for a long, agonizing moment, Alex finally managed to open them only after the terrifying urge to vomit had somewhat subsided.

“More… than this?”

His completely short-circuited brain finally managed to process the terrifying implication of Nathan’s words. Staring back with a flawlessly calm expression that offered absolutely zero clues to his inner thoughts, Nathan bluntly delivered the reality check. It was genuinely difficult to believe they were actually standing in the middle of the street holding hands.

“Like kissing.”