Chapter 54

After taking Amy Winnings’ initial statement, Alex handed the case over to Anna, who had arrived to lead the protection detail. Given the gravity of the situation, Inspector Janice had come to the scene to replace Sergeant Hayden, despite usually being desk-bound since her promotion. It was well past dawn, but time had lost its meaning for them; they all took a small, quiet comfort in the fact that the hospital never closed its doors.

Alex requested the night shift at headquarters to conduct a search and door-to-door inquiry around the hospital parking lot and the neighboring alleys. Finally, around three in the morning, he headed home. He had been on duty since eight the previous morning, meaning he’d been awake for nearly twenty-four hours. He wouldn’t have much time to sleep.

Not that I’d be able to sleep anyway.

After showering, Alex sat on his bed with his wet hair hanging down, water dripping onto the towel around his neck. The rain, which had briefly paused, was once again hammering against the window. It seemed a monsoon was arriving before the winter could.

As he watched the rain, Alex suddenly remembered that he used to love rainy days. It felt like a memory from a different life, so distant it was hard to believe it was true.

He stood and looked around his room. Because his credit score and finances weren’t enough to rent a proper house, he had leased a studio in a bleak apartment building on the outskirts of Peckham, Southwark. It wasn’t a nice neighborhood; in fact, it was a high-crime area.

Even so, the rent was absurdly high for the location. It was a sixty-six-square-meter studio with a kitchen and a bathroom, modest enough for London, but it was his home. He had to pay for heating separately and only turned on the radiator on the coldest days; the building was completely unmanaged, but it was still his sanctuary.

The stark, rectangular space held nothing but the bare essentials: a bed, a desk, a chair, basic kitchen appliances, and a television.

Alex walked to his desk and opened a drawer. Inside were the worn-out remnants of his past that he’d hidden away to avoid looking at them. He picked up the frayed, pathetic-looking wristband and laughed at how clingy and miserable he was. He knew it was trash, useless items that would eventually just crumble into dust.

Even knowing this, Alex failed to throw them away yet again. He stared at the band and thought of the surreal events of the night: Nathan claiming they were strangers, then looking at him with contempt after they bumped into each other. Then, Alex realized one very sad truth.

Even in those moments of agonizing pain, he had felt an irrepressible joy at seeing Nathan again.

And it was that very joy that made him truly miserable.

☂