Chapter 76

Alex didn’t press for details.

He was too afraid of what the answer might be, and this small admission was enough. If this moment held some kind of meaning for Nathan, he could endure it.

“It’s my first time, too.” Alex confessed the words softly, rubbing his damp face against the pillow.

“I imagine so.” Nathan seemed to misunderstand the context. Alex knew that for him, it wasn’t just this specific situation. This was his first time being with anyone. But he chose to remain silent. It wouldn’t change anything, anyway.

As Alex grew quiet, Nathan resumed his exploration. Alex lay there with his mouth agape, enduring the strange, clinical probing. Suddenly, Nathan’s finger pressed against a point deep inside, near his lower abdomen, and Alex’s eyes flew wide.

“Ah… ha… ah!”

A high, sharp sound escaped him, a moan far more acute than any that had come before. It was a reflexive cry that Nathan couldn’t help but notice.

“You like that?” Nathan’s voice dropped to a low, gravelly rasp. He pressed the spot again, increasing the pressure until Alex’s vision went white. His arousal, which had begun to wane, surged back to its peak.

“Ah… ngh… yes… ah… haaa!”

Nathan added a second finger, the two of them working in a steady, thrusting motion that targeted that sensitive inner wall. Alex’s arms felt numb. He rose onto his knees and elbows, moaning with a vulnerability that felt entirely unsuited to his size. He was mortified, yet he couldn’t stop himself.

“Don’t hold it back. Tell me how good it feels.”

When he felt Nathan’s body press against his back, wrapping him in an embrace, something inside Alex finally snapped. His eyes grew hot and blurry. He leaned his forehead against Nathan’s hand, which was braced beside his face, and panted, “It’s good… it’s so good…”

I love you, Nathan. I love you so much. I love you, I love you, I love you.

The physical pleasure was secondary. He was simply overwhelmed by Nathan’s presence, by the fact that the man was actually touching him. Tears finally spilled over his reddened eyelids. The warmth of Nathan’s body and the crushing weight of his embrace filled Alex’s chest until it ached. The shame and the awkwardness no longer mattered. At that realization, a shiver raced to the tips of his toes, and he knew he was about to go.

“It’s good… ngh… so… good…”

Alex repeated the words like a mantra between his sobs. He felt Nathan’s lips trace a path across his shoulder before the fingers were finally withdrawn. Nathan pulled back, and Alex heard the unmistakable sound of a packet being torn open.

“I can’t wait anymore.” Nathan’s voice was thick and broken.

Alex nodded dumbly, pressing his forehead against the mattress as he struggled to regulate his breathing. He felt completely detached from his own body. Nathan’s lips returned to his neck and ear, his kisses now more desperate and intense, before he finally pressed a soft kiss to Alex’s cheek. It was a jarringly tender gesture compared to his earlier aggression, and it made Alex ache for more.

He wanted to feel Nathan properly. He wanted to look at his face, to taste him, to be connected in the most literal sense. Alex turned his head, his dark green eyes meeting Nathan’s intense gaze, and they stared at each other for a long moment as if bound by an invisible thread.

“I’m coming in.” Nathan rasped the words.

Alex felt something blunt and incredibly hard press against his entrance. It felt like a solid rod, and the sheer size of it made Alex certain it would never fit.

“H-ha… Nathan… ngh…”

A primal fear gripped him as the object began to force its way inside. A cold sweat broke out on his brow. If a finger had been difficult, this felt impossible. He realized then that he had never actually seen Nathan’s lower half properly, his anatomy having been hidden by the robe.

“Relax,” Nathan commanded.

“I… I don’t know how… ah… it hurts…”

Nathan’s ragged breathing filled his ear as Alex buried his face in the duvet and groaned in pain. The tip of Nathan’s length pushed against him, but the resistant inner walls blocked his progress. Nathan leaned down and rubbed his cheek against Alex’s, a gesture of intimacy that made Alex flinch.

As his tension momentarily eased, Nathan managed to push a bit further, the dull ache of the invasion turning into a sensation of being stretched to his limit.

“Shh. That’s it. Good boy.”

The tenderness in Nathan’s voice made Alex’s tears flow faster. “Nathan…” he sobbed.

Nathan responded by pressing his body even closer.

“Can we… can we kiss?” The question came out in a small, broken voice.

Nathan, whose heart was hammering against Alex’s back, froze for a second before catching Alex’s jaw and turning his face. The expression in his green eyes was a chaotic mix of confusion and pain.

“Yes,” Nathan whispered.

The expression vanished as quickly as it had appeared, replaced by a soft hand cupping Alex’s cheek. Alex tilted his head back and surrendered to the kiss. His lips were captured, and he parted them eagerly, his tongue meeting Nathan’s in a desperate, clumsy dance. His mind went completely blank the moment their tongues touched.

He was like a man possessed, following Nathan’s lead and savoring the taste of him. Their saliva ran down Alex’s jaw and wetted his neck as he arched his head back, his breathing coming in frantic gasps. Even when Alex tried to pull back for air, Nathan wouldn’t let go, consuming him like a starving man.

Lost in the kiss, Alex barely noticed that Nathan was steadily pushing deeper into him. The distraction of the intimacy allowed his muscles to relax, and his body finally accepted the man’s entire length. When Nathan finally bottomed out, hitting that same sensitive spot he had found with his fingers, Alex’s entire body arched in a violent spasm.

“Ah… ha… Nathan… inside… you’re so deep…”

Alex clung to him as the sensation of being filled to the core overwhelmed his senses. Nathan wrapped both arms around him from behind and whispered, “Yes, I’m inside.”

“It’s… it’s weird… I feel… weird!”

“How is it weird?” Nathan asked, his voice a hot, broken rasp against Alex’s skin. He sounded more erotic than Alex had ever imagined possible.

Alex felt a sudden, boiling heat in his lower abdomen. His backside felt impossibly sensitive, and he was on the verge of admitting he was losing his mind when Nathan’s voice triggered a final, uncontrollable reaction. Without warning, his entire body went rigid.

“Ah… ah-h… ha!”

Alex climaxed.

With his eyes rolling back, he shuddered violently as a hot, frantic release spilled over his stomach. The scent of his pheromones, now thick and heavy, filled the room alongside the faint smell of semen.

Nathan let out a choked sound as Alex’s inner walls clamped down hard on him during his release. Nathan pulled out with a startled movement, taking a deep, steadying breath before shoving himself back in. Alex’s over-sensitized body jumped at the renewed stimulation.

“I… I finished, Nathan… ngh… please, stop…”

He was spent, his body sensitive to the point of pain and his strength completely gone. He didn’t even have the energy to wonder if he had finished too early or if he had lasted long enough.

But Nathan didn’t stop. He pulled back and drove himself in with a single, powerful thrust.

The sound of their bodies colliding was loud and wet.

Alex shook his head frantically and reached for the headboard, trying to pull himself away, but Nathan pinned him down and began to work his hips with a relentless, driving pace.

“Are you… trying to… drive me insane?” Nathan bit out between thrusts. He dragged his length against the sensitive inner walls, the friction generating a searing heat. The pain was there, but every time Nathan bottomed out, a fresh wave of pleasure would surge from his core.

Alex panted and shook his head, his voice reduced to a series of ragged gasps.

“Nathan… please… a break… give me a break… ah!”

“No.” Nathan refused flatly. He drove himself in so deep Alex could feel it in his stomach, and he whispered with the growl of a predator, “I can’t stop now.”