Chapter 31

“I’m home.”

On December 31st, the final day of the year, Yi-seon returned to an empty house. His parents were away on a year-end trip, leaving the residence hollow and quiet. Ryu Yi-jeong, who was living on his own down in the provinces, was not at home either.

Yi-seon spent the final winter break of his teens simply idling away the days. Having successfully submitted his application yesterday to the university of his first choice, he had nothing in particular left to do.

Today, on a whim, he had gone outside to soak in the year-end atmosphere by himself. Mugyeol had mentioned having a schedule, and a few other friends had texted asking him to hang out, but he simply hadn’t felt up to it.

After taking a shower, Yi-seon settled onto the sofa with a warm cup of tea. Lit only by a single dim lamp, the apartment was quiet and slightly chilly. Perhaps because the downstairs neighbors were hosting guests, the noisy bustle of their gathering drifted up through the floor from time to time.

Beyond the veranda, snow was falling. Feather-light snowflakes traced differing trajectories as they drifted down, vanishing in an instant against the dark. Seoul’s nightscape flickered and scattered through the flurry of white. Gazing blankly at the falling snow, Yi-seon curled his legs beneath him on the sofa, resting his cheek against his knees and burying his face.

“Ah… It’s so quiet and peaceful.”

From between his knees, Yi-seon’s low murmur echoed with a solitary ring.

How long had he stayed in that daze? The phone he had carelessly tossed onto the sofa began to ring. Checking the time, he saw it was 11:30 PM. Wondering who could possibly be calling at this late hour, he saw Yeon Mugyeol’s name on the screen.

“Hello?”

— “Home?”

“Yeah.”

— “Your mom went on a trip, right?”

“How did you know?”

— “Got it.”

“Got what?”

Click.

With those words, the line went dead. Was he drunk? Did he cut loose just because he’ll be an adult in a matter of hours?

He left the TV on to hear the Bosingak New Year’s bell chime, dozing off on the sofa. Just as the thirty-second countdown digits appeared on screen, the doorbell rang. Ding-dong, ding-dong—.

Startled awake from his slumber, Yi-seon blinked blearily and rose from the sofa. No one should be visiting at this hour. He wondered if the downstairs neighbors thought their noise was coming from his place, mistaking the source of the racket.

As he walked slowly toward the front door—Thud, thud, thud! Someone urgently hammered on the metal door from outside.

“Ryu Yi-seon.”

“Huh?”

Recognizing Mugyeol’s voice, a surprised Yi-seon rushed forward. Behind him, the TV began the countdown.

10, 9, 8—…

“Yeon Mugyeol?”

The moment he threw the front door wide open, the biting winter air coiled around the nape of his neck first. Then came a low voice.

“Happy birthday.”

3, 2, 1—… Happy New Year!

From the TV, the resonant chime of the New Year’s bell rang out alongside the cheers of the crowd. At that exact second, Pop! A party cracker burst above his head. It was the birthday cake firecracker Mugyeol had set off.

“You’re an adult now, Ryu Yi-seon.”

“…”

Yi-seon stared blankly up at Mugyeol, who stood silhouetted against the dark hallway. As if he had run all the way here, Mugyeol was catching his breath with a faint smile on his lips. Flakes of unmelted snow rested on his shoulders, and the tips of his ears were flushed red from the biting winter wind.

Mugyeol held up a cake box and extended it forward.

“Let’s eat cake together.”

“…”

“Can I come in?”

“Ah, yeah…”

Only then did Yi-seon step aside. As Mugyeol stepped through the doorway, the scent of winter drifted in with him. The crisp, clean smell of snow swept over him, making Yi-seon’s head spin faintly.

Clang! Only after the front door clicked shut did Yi-seon regain his senses. The shoes Mugyeol wore were sleek, elegant dress shoes. Mugyeol, who had always worn sneakers, suddenly felt like an adult standing entirely on his own.

Following Mugyeol inside, Yi-seon finally got a proper look at his attire. Beneath his neatly tailored coat, he wore a crisp, tailored suit. As if he had just returned from an important event, his hair was immaculately styled, and a faint trace of perfume lingered on his collar.

Imagining Mugyeol all dressed up to meet Jeong Soram’s family, Yi-seon gave his head a small shake to clear the thought away.

After washing his hands, Mugyeol seated Yi-seon at the dining table.

“Hold on. Let me light the cand—… Ah.”

Mugyeol, who had cheerfully opened the cake box, suddenly wore an expression of hollow defeat. The cake was a complete disaster. The decorative toppings had tumbled to one side and were smeared in cream, and the sides looked crushed and battered from being violently jostled during the run.

Carefully lifting the cake out while getting cream all over his fingers, Mugyeol let out an apologetic sigh.

“I tried to be careful, but it’s totally ruined.”

“…Did you run here?”

“Yeah.”

“You should’ve just walked instead of exhausting yourself.”

“Then midnight would’ve passed. I wanted to celebrate the exact second you peeled off that minor label.”

Mugyeol continued talking as he inserted the candles with pale, frozen fingers, “It was so late that the bus intervals were huge, and I couldn’t catch a cab. I thought it was close enough to walk, but it ended up being further than I thought. I had to sprint, so it must’ve shaken around. I’m sorry.”

“…”

Between the year-end rush and the snowfall, transportation would have been even more difficult.

Yi-seon pictured Mugyeol sprinting through the snowy streets dressed in a long coat and dress shoes. He imagined the footprints he must have left behind in the snow.

Those footprints—thump, thump, thump—seemed to stamp themselves into his own heart. With every step, they pressed down firmly against his chest, leaving an imprint as deep and hot as a branding iron on this freezing night.

“Cut me some slack though, it’s a hotel cake. It’s the most popular one, so getting my hands on it wasn’t easy.”

Playfully bantering, Mugyeol lit the two tall candles and pushed the cake in front of Yi-seon.

“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday to Ryu Yi-seon… whom I love? Happy birthday to you.”

When singing ‘dear Ryu Yi-seon’—or rather, ‘beloved Ryu Yi-seon’—he even added a playful, questioning tone before finishing the song.

With the song finished, Mugyeol pushed the cake closer, urging him to blow out the candles. Behind the flickering flames, Mugyeol’s smiling face was visible. Unable to hold Mugyeol’s gaze beneath the dancing crimson glow, Yi-seon closed his eyes. Whoosh. He softly blew out the flame.

Please let me stay by Yeon Mugyeol’s side for a very long time. Whether as friends or whatever else, always together.

It was his very first wish upon becoming a legal adult.

He had occasionally thought about it: perhaps it would be better to put some distance between himself and Mugyeol. If physical distance grew between them, his feelings would eventually fold away too.

Yet whenever he had this tender Mugyeol right before his eyes, such thoughts melted away like snow on an open palm. Being together brought him enough happiness that staying like this felt more than fine.

It was the first whole birthday cake he had ever received in his life. His parents had always let his birthdays pass as if they barely mattered, and because Yi-seon never brought it up in advance, he had never shared cake with friends either.

Every January first, amid crowds of people celebrating the New Year, he had quietly celebrated his own birthday alone. Telling himself he was completely fine, he had listened to the New Year’s bell before any birthday song.

Tonight, however, was different. Yeon Mugyeol had come to him. He had stepped into his loneliness and filled it with warmth. Buried in the dark, Yi-seon had not even realized how lonely he was; only when Mugyeol lit the candle did he finally recognize the solitude that had always stayed curled and hidden in a corner of his heart.

How could I not love you when you’re like this?

Falling out of love was simply impossible from the start.

Even if Mugyeol continued seeing Jeong Soram—no, even if he married someone else entirely—this heart of his was not something that could easily be folded away.

“How did you know it was my birthday?”

“Is there anything about you I don’t know? I know you better than anyone, Ryu Yi-seon. Every year, you looked like you didn’t want to make a fuss about it, so I let it slide. But this year is different. You became an adult.”

“Thank you…”

“What’s this? Why are you being so obedient?”

Yi-seon lightly nudged Mugyeol’s shoulder, then grabbed plates and forks before sitting down.

Mugyeol likely attached no deep meaning to this celebration. He was someone who took attentive care of his friends, so he surely just wanted to celebrate a birthday he had happened to learn about.

Yet for Yi-seon, it was entirely different. The first person he had ever fallen for was Mugyeol. The first person to properly celebrate his birthday was Mugyeol. And the one who threw his heart into such turmoil was Mugyeol. It was all Mugyeol. He was the first and only person in his entire life.

“It might look messed up, but it still tastes good, right?”

“Yeah. It’s really delicious.”

Yi-seon scooped up a generous bite of cake with his fork and slipped it into his mouth. The sweet whipped cream melted softly on his tongue.

The cake was not ruined.

This cake was perfect. It was the most perfect cake in the world.

Once he finished his slice of cake, Mugyeol rose from his chair. After double-checking whether Yi-seon had properly submitted his college applications, he slipped his coat back on.

“You’re leaving?”

“Yeah. I have an appointment first thing tomorrow morning, so I need to sleep early.”

Calling it sleeping early when midnight had already passed was a stretch. Even so, Yi-seon offered no argument and walked Mugyeol to the front door. When he offered to see him down to the first floor, Mugyeol made a huge fuss about the danger of being kidnapped in the middle of the night, so Yi-seon gave up on stepping outside.

“Thanks for celebrating my birthday today.”

“Forget it. Just make sure you celebrate mine from now on.”

“Got it. But can’t you just get one from your girlfriend? Next year, I’ll try asking my girlfriend for a cake too.”

Yi-seon gave a slight shake of his head. He was genuinely grateful, but he wanted to politely decline any further kindness. Things would become troublesome if his feelings deepened beyond this point. He wanted his unrequited love to stop right here.

“I don’t have a girlfri—… What? You’re going to get a cake from your girlfriend?”

Mugyeol’s expression hardened as he slipped on his shoes. Turning around, he took a long stride right back up into the entryway.

“You had a girlfriend? Who?”

Approaching with only one shoe on and an intimidatingly grim scowl, Mugyeol prompted Yi-seon to frantically wave his hands.

“No, I don’t mean I have one right now. I’m saying I’ll date someone in the future. The Suneung is over, and I have plenty of time.”

“…”

“…Yeon Mugyeol?”

Yeon Mugyeol fell into prolonged silence, staring intently at Yi-seon. Then, letting out a soft scoff, he lightly tapped Yi-seon’s cheek.

“What girlfriend? You haven’t even had your first kiss.”

“…”

I have though…

With Su-ah noona…

And with you, too… Even if that was an accident…

With Su-ah, it had been closer to ‘getting kissed’ rather than ‘kissing’, but it had happened nonetheless. However, given who the other party was, there was no way he could ever tell Mugyeol, so he chose silence.

Instantly, Mugyeol’s expression chilled into an icy stillness.

“What’s that look?”

“…”

“Did you? No way, right?”

“…”

“…With who? Who did you do it with?”

“…”

“Hey. Answer me.”

Yeon Mugyeol pressed him with a low, sinking voice, eerily calm yet intense. Startled by this unfamiliar face on Mugyeol, Yi-seon took a step back. Mugyeol stepped forward, closing more distance than Yi-seon had opened.

Mugyeol’s grip painfully seized Yi-seon’s shoulder. The thin fabric of his pajama shirt crumpled beneath the hold, pressing deep into his tender flesh.

“Who was it? Is it someone I know?”

“I don’t know…”

“Who is it? Why can’t you say it? Is it because you’re lying?”

“What is wrong with you all of a sudden?”

With wide, startled eyes, Yi-seon knocked Mugyeol’s hand away. In contrast to the painful grip, the hand came off easily. Instinctively clutching his wildly thumping heart, Yi-seon looked up in bewilderment to find Mugyeol’s face frozen cold.

Yi-seon forcibly gripped Mugyeol’s broad shoulders to turn him around and usher him out the door.

“You said you had to go. You must be tired, so hurry up and leave. I was really grateful today. I’ll treat you to something delicious later.”

Mugyeol had to be exhausted as it was, and Yi-seon had no desire to drag out such a pointless argument.

Besides, if he got pulled any further into this, Su-ah’s name might slip out. Setting aside his own awkwardness, this was a matter of Ham Su-ah’s privacy. In his heart, he wanted nothing more than to explain to Mugyeol that it had just been a mistake with his noona and nothing serious, but considering Ham Su-ah’s position, he could not speak rashly.

Mugyeol stepped outside more readily than expected. Yet through the closing gap of the front door, his sharp gaze remained fixed on Yi-seon, glaring fiercely.

“Bye… Get home safe…”

Intimidated by that glare, Yi-seon offered a brief wave and promptly pulled the door shut. Click. Even after the lock engaged automatically, no footsteps came from beyond the steel door. Only after a long stretch of silence did the crisp clack-clack of Mugyeol’s dress shoes fade away from the entryway.

“Did he notice something…? No, couldn’t be…”

There’s no way he realized it was Su-ah noona, right?

If that’s why he’s acting like this…

With a pounding heart, Yi-seon stepped back into the living room.

In the middle of the empty, chilly room, the cake sat alone. The sight of it brought an instinctive smile to his lips.

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