Chapter 36

Muwon stood at once and approached the limping man’s family first. Even after finishing her porridge, the little girl was clutching her stomach. Her mother appeared to have fallen asleep against her husband, lacking the strength to remain upright on her own. The restaurant had been darkened by the storm. When Muwon’s enormous shadow came stomping toward them, the startled man threw out an arm to shield his wife and daughter.

Without a word, Muwon held out his broad palm, which looked nearly as large as the lid of a pot. Several snacks rested upon it.

The man reached out instinctively, then hesitated.

“Are you… giving these to us?”

“Yes. They’re not from me. They’re from that person over there.”

Muwon indicated Yu-su with his chin. The man quickly accepted the snacks and bowed his head in Yu-su’s direction.

“Th-thank you. Yerin, you should say thank you too.”

“Thank you, Uncle!”

Yerin turned and bowed to Muwon as well.

“Thank you, Big… Big Uncle!”

Muwon stared at her.

“…Yeah. Big Uncle will stand right here, so go ahead and eat.”

The man woke his sleeping wife and gave her half the apple cookie, then passed the remaining half to his daughter. Yerin ate eagerly for several bites before suddenly stopping and holding her share out to her father.

“Daddy, you eat too.”

“No. Daddy’s fine, so Yerin should eat plenty.”

“I want to see Daddy eat.”

The man’s eyes seemed to fill with tears. He pulled both his wife and daughter into his arms and held them for a long time.

Muwon remained standing nearby, rigid and silent as he watched the tender scene unfold. The people around them also kept stealing glances in that direction, even while pretending not to stare. Half of those watching looked envious. The others appeared moved, their concern focused on the child. Some seemed tempted to object, but with Muwon looming over the family, no one dared say a word.

Afterward, Muwon visited the elderly couple, the woman who had shared her meal, and the grieving man before returning to Yu-su.

Yu-su had been sucking on the candy while he waited. By the time Muwon came back, it had shrunk almost to nothing. Yu-su crunched what remained between his teeth and rose from the sofa.

“I need to wash up.”

“Your fever hasn’t gone down, and the water here is fucking freezing.”

“I feel filthy. I’ll be careful.”

“Just stay still. Give me a minute.”

Muwon disappeared into the kitchen. Around ten minutes later, he returned and led Yu-su toward the bathroom, where a pot of hot water had been placed on the floor.

“I’ll pour some out for you. Mix it with the cold water.”

Yu-su stared at the steaming pot. “Where did you get this?”

“Went over there and raised hell.”

Muwon had fired two bullets while scouting with a collection of unreliable strangers. In a situation like this, surely that earned him a little hot water.

Listening to Muwon explain, Yu-su could easily imagine what had happened in the kitchen. Muwon had probably issued an ultimatum, threatening to separate from the group the next day unless they gave him the water. Park Yeongil, who still needed both Muwon and the gun, must have yielded.

Whatever had happened, the warm water was a blessing. Yu-su washed himself quietly and thanked Muwon when he finished.

“You’re back, hyungs?”

Freshly warmed, Yu-su returned to the sofa with a blanket draped over his shoulders. Muwon, who had already reclined deeply against the cushions, merely lifted his chin.

“Yeah. Anything happen while we were gone?”

“Nothing serious,” Gorak replied. “But a few people kept staring over here while you hyungs were away.”

“I think they’re interested in the backpacks,” Hee-eun said.

The makeshift bags, fashioned from shower gowns and hiking packs, were conspicuous enough on their own. Now that people had seen food coming out of them, they naturally attracted even more attention.

Muwon nudged one of the stuffed bags with his foot. “Move in pairs whenever you can. Either stay where you are or take the bags with you.”

“Yes.”

“Understood.”

As he listened, Yu-su swept his damp hair away from his forehead. His gaze had naturally fallen toward the floor when he heard a soft exclamation beside him.

“Whoa…”

Curious, he lifted his head and found Gorak giving him a thumbs-up.

“What?”

“Hyung, I already knew you were handsome, but now that you’ve washed up, you’re practically glowing. You’re a real beauty…”

Yu-su’s gentle features were flushed from the warm water, while the dampness of his eyelashes and hair had deepened their color. The lethargy of his illness softened his already serene air, lending him an almost ethereal appearance.

Muwon’s brows drew sharply together. “What the hell are you talking about?”

“Huh? I said he’s a beauty. Yu-su-hyung is pretty.”

“I heard you. What kind of bullshit is calling another guy pretty?”

Under Muwon’s stare, Gorak’s philtrum stretched long and his mouth fell open in a perfect trapezoid.

“Whoa…”

“What?”

The exclamation was the same, but its meaning had changed completely. With Muwon’s voice turning menacing, Gorak clapped a hand over his mouth and spoke with painstaking clarity.

“Seriously, you’re a third-generation chaebol heir who’s completely out of touch with modern society.”

Pfft!

Hee-eun spat her water into the air, erupted into a coughing fit, and whipped her head away. Muwon’s eyebrows shot upward.

“Private Sim Gorak. Have you become comfortable around me already?”

Gorak immediately snapped to attention. “Private Sim Gorak! No, sir! Ahh, save me, hyung!”

“Do Muwon, don’t hit the kid.”

“What do you mean, hit him? I only flicked his forehead.”

“A third-generation chaebol heir who’s out of touch…” Hee-eun muttered.

Yu-su rubbed his throbbing temples.

An hour later, the smell of the communal meal had faded, leaving behind only the relentless patter of rain. The restaurant had grown exceptionally quiet. After sending Gorak and Hee-eun away to wash, Yu-su opened his notebook and stared out at the rain-drowned city.

Yu-su finished the brief entry, then stared at the words ‘Many people died’. Unlike the otherwise neat handwriting, those three words slanted crookedly across the page because his pen had stopped several times while he wrote them. Too many lives and too many final words were trapped inside that meager sentence for him to record it so simply.

Again…

The letters seemed to bleed red across the paper.

A sharp scream tore through his ears.

Yu-su clamped his hands over them and squeezed his eyes shut, but the tinnitus only swelled, ringing louder as though trapped inside his skull. Unable to endure it, he raised his palms to strike his ears.

Hot hands caught both his wrists before he could.

Familiar breath drew close.

“Jeong Yu-su.”

Yu-su said nothing.

“This happens the moment I leave your side.”

Frowning, Yu-su lowered his head further. He wanted to conceal his expression, but he knew Muwon had already seen through him. Muwon released the wrists that had grown noticeably thinner in only two days, then pressed his palm to Yu-su’s forehead.

“Your fever still hasn’t gone down.”

Irritation roughened Muwon’s voice as he dropped onto the sofa beside him. The cushions sank under his weight, tipping Yu-su toward him. Muwon wrapped an arm around Yu-su’s shoulders and drew him closer.

Perhaps Yu-su simply did not want to be alone.

Perhaps his aching body had left him too weak to resist.

Enveloped in Muwon’s warmth, he set the notebook aside, leaned back, and closed his eyes. He prayed for the ringing to disappear and concentrated on the sound of the rain, but Muwon seemed to misunderstand his silence. A long sigh drifted down from above Yu-su’s head.

“Don’t think about useless things, Jeong Yu-su.”

“I’m not thinking about anything like that. It’s just… I can’t forget.”

Muwon fell silent.

“More importantly, could you say something? Anything. I need something else to think about.”

“What do you mean, anything?” Muwon gave a quiet scoff. “What were you doing just now?”

It felt like balancing on a tightrope. Yu-su focused entirely on Muwon’s voice and forced the words out one syllable at a time, afraid he would begin trembling or stuttering if his concentration slipped. Without noticing, he had tightened his grip around the hand resting across his shoulder.

“Um… I was writing a log.”

“A log?”

“I’ve been recording information. What I did that day, what I found, and things like that.”

“I see.”

Muwon glanced toward the notebook Yu-su had pushed away. Feeling the trembling of the body held within his arm, he spoke again with an impatience that sounded almost forced.

“Next question, then. Why were you exempted from military service?”

“I was exempted because I had to support the kids.”

Muwon went quiet.

Yu-su eventually opened his eyes and looked up at him. “Why?”

“No reason. It’s nothing.”

After holding his gaze for a brief moment, Muwon swallowed a low sigh and changed the subject.

“Do you think you’ll be able to sleep like this?”

“I don’t know. Could we stay like this a little longer?”

“Do whatever you want.”

Muwon shifted sideways and pulled Yu-su with him. By the time Yu-su emerged from his daze, he was lying down with his cheek resting against Muwon’s firm thighs.

Do Muwon had always been like this.

He gave Yu-su special treatment.

When they were younger, that favoritism had made Yu-su happy. After they severed ties, remembering it had filled him with resentment. Now, however, he wanted to depend upon it.

Curling into himself a little more, Yu-su looked up at Muwon and reached out to poke his angular jaw.

“Do Muwon.”

“What?”

“Thank you.”

“Forget it.”

When Muwon looked down, Yu-su quickly withdrew his hand and closed his eyes. The screams that had been circling inside his ears had somehow faded. A faintly playful note entered his tired voice. “Your thighs are too high.”

“I told you to sleep, Jeong Yu-su.”

“When did you say that?”

“Just now.”

Muwon covered Yu-su’s eyes with his palm.

Yu-su returned to a safe darkness, but he never truly fell asleep that day. Whenever he slipped into a light, fragmented doze, nightmares were all that awaited him.

***