Chapter 20

Unlike last time, Cha Gyuhan slicked back his hair and wore a formal suit. He had no choice. Previously, Gong Jio had picked out how he should style his hair and what clothes he should wear, but this time he had to get ready all on his own.

As a result, he looked less like someone heading out on a date and more like Cha Gyuhan reporting for a corporate shift.

“Sss, still.” Right before heading out, Gyuhan peered at his reflection in the hallway mirror and muttered, “I’m a good-looking guy. This is practically a fast-track pass for meeting the in-laws.”

Having lost a bit of weight recently, his muttered reflection actually looked even further from an in-law fast-track pass than usual. But Gyuhan had always rated himself as stellar son-in-law material, so he viewed himself through that lens once again. If there was one detail he took special care with, it was wearing a necktie to tone down the slightly swaggering, unbuttoned look he usually gave off without one.

However, Lee Sohee’s reaction was rather subtle.

“Looks like you had to work over the weekend. If you were busy, we could have rescheduled.”

“No?” Gyuhan asked, bewildered.

“I thought you came straight from work…. Hmm…. I guess you didn’t get ready with your friend today, then. It’s a bit different.”

Remembering Gong Jio’s role and presence that Gyuhan had rambled on about last time, Lee Sohee asked, and Gyuhan answered with total candor, “Yes. He went on a business trip. Isn’t a fresh look nice too? Sohee-ssi, I have a better physique than most mannequins. I hear all the time that suits look great on me. What do you think? It won’t be embarrassing to walk around with me by your side, right?”

Gyuhan’s strength was his honesty, and his flaw was probably the very same thing.

Lee Sohee muttered, “Embarrass…” before nodding in resignation. “I suppose so.”

At her calm reply, Gyuhan grinned.

Seeing her a second time made it even clearer. The inexplicable familiarity he felt toward Lee Sohee, the reason he had felt comfortable from the first day—she resembled Gong Jio. Her expressionless face that gave away nothing of her inner thoughts, her flat, even vocal tone.

It feels like I’m on a date with the female version of Gong Jio.

Without the slightest awareness of how bizarre that thought was, Gyuhan escorted Lee Sohee. He pulled out her chair as he’d been taught and hung up her coat. That he looked more like a male escort than a well-mannered boyfriend was just another of Gyuhan’s natural talents.

A conventional date of dining and coffee ensued. Lee Sohee mostly listened, while Gyuhan talked.

“Anyway, so you have no idea how much the manager threw a fit. No matter how much I told her that you would be different, she wouldn’t listen.”

Gyuhan’s current topic of conversation was the episode where he tried to find out Gong Jio’s romantic type and ended up relaying that enlightened truth to the manager by mistake.

“And then?”

“Pardon?”

“So what did your friend say his type was?”

“Ah. He said he likes someone oblivious.”

One might have expected a comment like his taste is weird or he’s a bit funny, but Gyuhan stopped right there. Watching him deliver only the facts without rashly passing judgment, Lee Sohee suddenly asked, “Have you slept with your friend?”

Gyuhan nodded immediately. “Yes, of course. We sleep together often. It’s been a regular thing since we were kids. Nowadays, if we don’t sleep together once in a while, it feels like something’s itching.” Gyuhan let out a hearty laugh. Haha.

Pausing to choose her words at Gyuhan’s response, Lee Sohee began again. “No. What I mean is…”

Even though she had half-expected this reaction and carefully weighed her phrasing, she found herself tongue-tied and struggling to continue. Besides, she had never asked such a direct, intrusively rude question about someone’s private life. But she had to. It would be a critical factor for the direction of any future relationship.

“I’m asking if the two of you have ever slept together in the sense of having sexual intercourse.”

Gyuhan blinked, unable to digest Lee Sohee’s considerate phrasing right away.

Sexual intercourse…. The sex education class from his school days drifted into Gyuhan’s mind. While the other guys snickered, he had listened with shining eyes and full concentration. How to practice safe sex. And what is sex? In other words, sexual intercourse. Making love….

His favorite term was ‘making love,’ but setting that aside since it was a term reserved solely for a wife/honey/darling, it was a word Gyuhan remembered. He just never expected to hear it bundled together in a sentence linking Gong Jio and himself.

“No?”

After a moment of buffering, Gyuhan’s eyes went wide.

“No? We’re not in that kind of relationship? Sohee-ssi, we are just friends, and there’s no way that would happen. Goodness, that was almost a huge misunderstanding. We do sleep together often, but it’s definitely not that kind of sleep. Huh? You shouldn’t misunderstand.”

Lee Sohee patiently waited through Gyuhan’s flustered babbling. Once he closed his mouth and ordered an iced coffee, she calmly explained the intent behind her question.

“Gyuhan-ssi, I’ll speak frankly.”

But before delving into the main point, she laid out the hard truth Gyuhan desperately needed to hear.

“Gyuhan-ssi, if you don’t change, you’re going to keep getting dumped.”

“Excuse me…?”

“Women don’t like men with your style. As a casual fling maybe, but as a marriage partner, it’s a bit—no, very much a no. But you only date with the intention of getting married, don’t you?”

If Gyuhan were a comic book protagonist, a pitch-black background with lightning strikes would have crashed down over his head. But this was not a comic book, and thus there was no truth he could dodge simply by not turning the page. The unavoidable reality was ruthless.

“Gyuhan-ssi, honestly, you’re too old-fashioned. What’s with all this ‘wifey’ and ‘a bunch of kids’ talk? Who talks like that these days? The reason I agreed to an after-date—aside from the fact that I came out here to earn some pocket money in the first place—was because you were honest from the start and declared yourself a bomb. At least you wouldn’t be two-faced.”

“A-A bomb? I’ve never been called a bomb anywhere! My face and body aren’t lacking anywhere, Sohee-ssi.”

“Yes, exactly. I only look at faces and bodies. That’s why, despite everything I just said, I didn’t think you were bad. Anyway, listen to the rest.”

Trying to deny the undeniable reality, Gyuhan straightened his posture under Lee Sohee’s gentle pressure.

“On a matchmaking date, talking about fateful encounters, a harmonious family, how the more siblings the better—how is that supposed to appeal to anyone? And having lots of friends—sure, that’s fine. It means you’re sociable. But having that many regular social gatherings? That’s a huge turn-off. Are you listening?”

“…Yes.”

“Especially that close friend of yours. Finding out his romantic type aside, you talk about him so much that you know what it feels like? It feels like we’re on a date with three people.”

“Th-Three people?”

To Gyuhan, for whom NTR was a crime and polyamory was so abhorrent he’d erased the very concept from his mind, words failed him. Three people? How could she imagine something so horrifying? No, had he made her imagine that? Then in reality… were they in an NTR relationship?

Gyuhan’s mind raced way ahead. That was proof of just how deep the shock ran.

“You like your friend way too much. It’s to the point where I’m terrified you two will end up living together. Everywhere we go, it’s a place your friend recommended, things you did together, clothes he picked out, hair he styled… Honestly? It’s scarier than an ex-first-love you stayed best friends with because you couldn’t get over them.”

Having finished her piece, Lee Sohee caught her breath and wet her throat. After emptying her water glass, she rested her clasped hands and gave Gyuhan a slight nod. But even at this gesture signaling that it was now his turn to speak if he had anything to say, Gyuhan couldn’t pull himself together.

Even when Gong Jio punched me, I wasn’t this dazed.

True to old habits dying hard, he was thinking about Gong Jio yet again.

Watching him, Lee Sohee rummaged through her bag. After talking so much, she craved a cigarette. But on a date that hadn’t properly wrapped up—even if it looked like it would end right here—stepping out for a smoke before a clean finish felt impolite.

Shoving the cigarette pack back deep into her bag, Lee Sohee called Gyuhan softly.

“Gyuhan-ssi, think about it.”

“Pardon…? Th-Think about what…? Am I even a bastard who has the right to think…?” Gyuhan’s voice trembled as he realized he had almost become an unwitting NTR criminal.

“Being an old fogey doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to think.”

Lee Sohee didn’t bother filtering her words anymore. It seemed whatever she said barely registered in his ears anyway.

“I really only look at face and body.”

“Yeees…”

Gong Jio has a great face and body too. If the three of us dated, wouldn’t I be at a disadvantage? Who’s the primary partner? Me, or Gong Jio? Or…

Though he answered weakly, Gyuhan’s thoughts were ricocheting wildly. His imaginary future wife and Gong Jio? Dazed, Gyuhan shook his head vigorously. The astonishing thing was that even in this preposterous, absurd fantasy, he wasn’t angry at Gong Jio being in that position. Was it because he recognized it as his own nonsensical imagination?

“Gyuhan-ssi. Gyuhan-ssi.”

Snapping back, he lifted his head. Lee Sohee continued, “I’m even fine with Gyuhan-ssi being a bit… well, oblivious. As long as you have no underlying health conditions, no family medical history, and you look good, that’s enough. More than money, anyway. I have plenty of money myself.”

Why was she saying this? Giving the disease and then the medicine?

Having finally gotten the order right, Gyuhan blinked.

“So here is the condition I’m offering.”

Between Gyuhan’s attire today and Lee Sohee’s words, the gathering drifted even further from a matchmaking date. The atmosphere was practically that of a job interview.

“If you imagine sleeping with that friend of yours and, instead of going ‘Ugh,’ you go ‘Hmm?’, then please decline the third date request I send.”

Having truly finished, Lee Sohee gathered her bag and stood up. Gyuhan blankly tracked her with his gaze. Not even realizing she was bidding him goodbye, he was left sitting alone without even seeing her off properly.

“Your coffee is ready.”

And like a tardy guest, the coffee finally arrived late.

Gyuhan sat dazed for a long while before standing up, having barely touched the coffee.

On the way back, his head was a chaotic tangle, filled to the brim with Lee Sohee’s scathing rebuke. The gloom was beyond words. When it grew too complicated to process without high-level categorization, his brain practically went on strike, going numb.

Early in the day, well before sunset, Gyuhan sat on his living room sofa for a long time before his phone’s vibration snapped him out of it.

❮Merry Matchmaking Manager⠇

—Member-nim~ Did you have a good time? ^^

“A… good time…?” Gyuhan muttered like an android mimicking human speech for the first time.

A good time.

In English, that meant happy time.

Sohee was a good person, but as for whether the time spent was good—it wasn’t. It had been terrifying. Not her, but the state of his own mind.

Right. That was the problem. The issue was that he hadn’t had a happy time. Gyuhan engaged in deep self-reflection. In other words, an act known as avoidance. Normally he would have genuinely reflected, but this time he practiced avoidance under the guise of reflection and reached a conclusion.

Let’s have a happy time.

Gyuhan resolutely sprang to his feet and marched into the bathroom. He washed with grim solemnity, vigorously massaging his body as it loosened in the warm steam. When he stepped into the bedroom wearing only a bathrobe, his hands held the tools for his happy time.

‘Hyung, honestly, I think you really love getting penetrated.’

Recalling the words of his one-time sex partner, Go Woonha, Gyuhan shook his head.

No way. Nonsense. He was merely studying directly through his own body for the sake of the future; he didn’t enjoy it.

‘If you imagine sleeping with that friend of yours and, instead of going ‘Ugh,’ you go ‘Hmm?’, then please decline the third date request I send.’

A third date? He would definitely accept it. Because something like going “Hmm?” would never happen.

Gyuhan took out a brand-new dildo that Go Woonha had bought and left behind as a “gift.”

Thirty minutes later.

Gyuhan lifted a limp hand to search for Lee Sohee’s contact. Typing character by character, his fingertips trembled, and his tightly clamped lips quivered. His thighs, spread wide in an X, were damp despite the fresh shower.

“……”

Gyuhan’s throat choked up, forcing him to pause writing the message. Burying his face in his hands, struggling desperately to swallow down the surge of emotion, he finally managed to send the text to Lee Sohee.

❮Merry Matchmaking Manager⠇

I am sorry. I don’t think I can go on the 3rd date.

“Fuck…!”

Gyuhan flung his phone to the side. It bounced and tumbled across the plush mattress a few times. Next, he rolled onto his side, flailing. But having experienced such an earth-shattering happy time, his legs—muscular lines be damned—had zero strength. His toe clipped the dildo, sending it tumbling to the floor. The wet splat added heavy weight to his post-nut clarity.

“I’m a fucking piece of trash…!”

Gyuhan sobbed in anguish. Not being the tearful type, it ended with him rubbing dry eyelids, but the choke in his throat was all too real.

Gyuhan lay sprawled in thick self-loathing for a long time. It was a mercy that he couldn’t view himself from a CCTV angle. If he had seen himself from a third-person perspective, he would have been incapacitated for a good while, with the bathrobe gaping wide open, his stomach drenched from ejaculating twice in a row, and the gap between his thighs trembling from how good it had felt.

“How could I… using a friend… using a friend as a side dish to get off… you dog-like… you fucking, Gong Jio, you… you rice-thief bastard…!”

By the end of his self-loathing lament, it was confusing whose fault he was even blaming.

Quite a bit more time passed.

Now freshly showered again, Gyuhan stared into his phone with swollen eyelids from rubbing his eyes so much. Having asked his younger brother where one could post questions and get answers, he had just learned about an online forum. Unaware of the unspoken social rule that one should spend time reading the room before posting on any site, Gyuhan bluntly banged out a post. Then again, with his level of tact, no amount of time would have been enough.

[I jerked off thinking about my friend. But my friend is a guy with the same gear as me. Do I like men?]

?

A moment later, comments rolled in.

User 1: Post content is “?” lmfao wtf;;

User 2: Then what else would it be?

User 3: This ain’t Naver KnowledgeiN lolololololololololol but it’s funny af for the first time in a while so I’ll let it slide. Yeah, bro, you’re gay.

User 4: Bro, bro, your dick gets hard for that, so what else would you be?

User 5: Leave him alone, this is hilarious. Drop an update article, I’ll like it.

“…What does this even mean?”

Gyuhan couldn’t understand most of the slang. The only one that hit him right at eye level was the comment, ‘Bro, bro, your dick gets hard for that, so what else would you be?’

That was the problem. That exact line was right on his wavelength. It was such a kind, relatable explanation.

Gyuhan slowly lowered his gaze. Down between his legs—now hidden beneath pants—hung his handsome piece, responsible, commendable, and still brand-new, just like its owner. Staring at it, Gyuhan let out a mournful groan. Sitting there until the screen dimmed, he flipped the phone over and raised a fist.

“You traitorous bastard! Did I raise you like this? Getting hard for a buddy with the same hardware—is that how I brought you up?!”

No way. Gyuhan silently wailed in denial. Concluding it was merely a reflex from having his back entrance prodded, he chose to agree with Go Woonha’s words instead.

“You just liked getting it in the back, didn’t you?! You like anything shoved up your ass?!”

Uttering words bordering on dirty talk to himself, Gyuhan harshly reproached himself—and unable to hit his vitals, he slapped his own thigh beside it.

After doing that a couple of times, he waddled awkwardly toward the liquor cabinet due to his stinging crotch. He almost never drank alone, but tonight he had to. Gyuhan filled a glass, got drunk rapidly, and fell asleep slumped right over the dining table.

And when he woke up again… his comrade through thick and thin, the little Cha Gyuhan who had recently acted with ungrateful insolence regardless of time and place, refused to wake up.

✦ ✦ ✦